@ericsshadow: Trump's rhetoric has become even more disturbing and incendiary. Today he claimed "Burger King fries are as good as McDonald's fries."
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@trevso_electric: Thank you for ordering this $2 necklace from Etsy. With shipping your total comes to $758,937. Item will arrive from Uzbekistan in 3 years
@xoCAMILLAxo: I bought a toilet brush at the store the other day but it kind of hurts so I think I'll go back to paper!
@stephenjmolloy: Doctor: "I think this patient is dying. What blood type is he?" Nurse: "B positive." Doctor: "Okay. I don't think this patient is dying."
@shutupmikeginn: "Dont put all your eggs in one basket," is a lie perpetuated by Big Basket to sell more baskets