@chopper4jk: Trust is knowing you never have to look through their phone.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Christi_Q: Dating is hard because guys are like "You're hot, can we do butt stuff yet?" and girls are like "It's been 3 days, where's my ring?"
@Tommytoughstuff: *Pulls gun* Alright give me the money, and don't try anything stupid." *Tries to put a fork in a light socket* "Hey! What did I just say"!?
@dave_cactus: [me on a ledge] COP: (through megaphone) WE'VE CALLED SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP! *Kris Kross steps out of a police van*
@jimmytorosian: Good cop: We know it was you. Just confess. Murderer: I didn't do nothin' Breaks the fourth wall cop: Your name in this tweet is Murderer.