@angeliav68: Truthfully officer, I wouldn't have pulled over, if I known all you were gonna do is complain about my driving..
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@sixthformpoet: If another day goes by without a Matthew, Mark, Luke and John forming a boyband called New Testament, I'm going to give up on everything.
@T_Bonezzz: If you're with me when I die, remember 2 things: 1) Do Not Resuscitate 2) Smash Phone on Ground
@DelanieFischer: Being an adult means assuming someone's dead every time your parents call you at work.
@Cheeseboy22: Sometimes, during the movie previews, I'll turn to the stranger sitting next to me and whisper, "We should really go see that together."