@NicCageMatch: Trying to take the best instagram picture ever but the kittens keep drowning in the latte.
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@thejessbess: I wrote a poem: Dinosaurs, they used to roar, but... No more. Still mad atchu, meteor.
@TheBoydP: If it's so good why can't I find a single car wash that carries the Brazilian wax thingy you guys keep tweeting about?
@DamienFahey: 70% of the Earth's surface is water. The other 30% is covered in advertisements for The Blacklist.