@LlamaInaTux: Turbulence is when the airplane hits someone's family photos backed up in the cloud.
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@AmishPornStar1: Don't you wish it was as easy to adjust the brightness level on people as it is on your phone?
@0point5twins: I choose toothpaste NOT recommended by dentists… those sneaky tooth-fiddlers have a lot to gain from promoting one that doesn't work.
@SardonicTart: "OMG why am I so sore?" *Flashback to me doing five push-ups yesterday* "Oh right."