@LlamaInaTux: Turbulence is when the airplane hits someone's family photos backed up in the cloud.
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@DjJazzyJeffro: A guy at the bar asked me to pass him the salt and pepper, so I punched him in the face and yelled, GET YOUR OWN DISTINGUISHED HAIR JERK!
@simoncholland: You can just start calling yourself an olympic hopeful. You don't have to fill out a form or anything.