@AristotlesNZ: Turns out exposing yourself to different cultures just gets you arrested in multiple countries.
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@Sassafrantz: [texting] ex: your friends were looking at me really strange at the game. me: yeah well I told them you died in a hot air balloon accident.
@Tmoney68: Thought it might be fun to go on American Ninja Warrior. Then I tripped over a rubber dog bone in my living room and put that dream to bed.
@evofck: My roommate wouldn't let me name our wireless network 'Bill Wi the Science Fi' because he has no sense of humor.
@JohnHilsen: Mankind has made a lot of mistakes, some of them truly monstrous. The Holocaust. Slavery. Calling it a "corn maze" and not a "maize maze."