@thejacquio: Turns out if you scream for no reason long enough, you get the rest of the day off from work.
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@GrantTanaka: [dark alley] Dealer: so what you want Me: a gram [dealer opens trenchcoat, revealing multiple grandmothers]
@Dani_Feld: All I do is eat, drink, sleep and tweet. I'm basically just a more annoying version of a Tamagotchi.
@Brianhopecomedy: I babysat for the first time and it was just non-stop screaming. Next time I'll look before I lie down on the couch.