@nocturnology: Turns out indoor stone throwing is a mistake no matter what your house is made of.
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@dragonsorbet: Me: do you like bad boys? Her: no Me: are you sure? Her: [covers her dog's ears] okay yes
@SchlubbyHubby: Lately I'm very optimistic about the future of my marriage... I caught my husband on Tinder, so hopefully he'll meet somebody... soon...