@MartaEffing: Turns out you have to *tell* a guy you're going out, otherwise you just end up standing on his doorstep wondering why he's in his sweats.
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@JohnLyonTweets: Movie idea: Family moves into haunted house; ghosts appear; family too busy staring at phones to notice; ghosts leave in disgust.
@markhoppus: Me: A 3-hour movie?! Who does that?! Also me: I will now watch all 13 hours of this tv series in one sitting.
@GingerHotDish: Daughter: Do you think Freddie Mercury and Edgar Allen Poe would get along? Me: Huh? Daughter: Cuz he's just a Poe boy from a Poe family.