@fuzzlime: Tweriod: That time of the month when all my tweets are moody, retain water and are about chocolate and cheesecake
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@slyoung5: Lady came to front door & asked if I'd donate to new pool they're building for kids. I told her to hang on & came back with a glass of water
@Storminika: I saw a lady at the gym on the exercise bike, wearing a helmet. So I put on a life jacket and got on the treadmill next to her.
@kimlockhartga: Oh, you think it's "awkward" going to a wedding by yourself? Try going when you've dated both the bride & groom.