@Parentpains: Twitter, because I owe people on Facebook money.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Sean_Burgundy_: [ Skydiving ] Instructor: SIR. You can't just jump out without your equipment on Me: *Shows him text of gf saying "We need to talk"
@Underchilde: Honk all you want, but if I don’t eat these donuts at this green light I’ll have to share them at home.
@Cali_Kid_Mike: "You clean up nicely", is just a polite way of saying, "You usually look like shit."