@VictorscarletJ: Twitter birth control: airfare
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@lovemydogduck: My boyfriend woke up this morning with a huge smile on his face. I love sharpies
@AGreaterMonster: Someone stole my car from the Target parking lot, but fortunately they returned it at 11:00 pm when it was the only car left in the lot.
@kelkulus: Adding "family" to words sucks out all the fun: Vacation? Family vacation. Car? Family car. Movie? Family movie. Affair? Family affair.