@Brentweets: Twitter is like a dorm, someone is always up at every hour, someone is crying and someone is drunk.
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@hotdogsladies: Conjecture: At some point in 2013, our neighbors will get so high that they accidentally sell their own weed. For weed money. To buy weed.
@jakehightower34: Evil Scientist: I will turn you three into...A Human Centipede! Hostage 1: No! Hostage 2: Please! No! Me: So...who gets to be the front?
@LoriLuvsShoes: My biggest regret of 2014? Probably when my husband watched "The Notebook" with me and then I yelled at him for not building me a house