@shanethevein: Twitter is what happens when you take the red pill and the blue pill.
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@Brampersandon_: [stand-up comic bombing] Comic: I guess I can tell you my joke about ghosts Audience: BOOOOOO! Comic: Oh ok you've heard that one before.
@UnFitz: I have an irrational fear that I'm accidentally making up words. I don't want to be misunderstandable.