@prttylttleditty: Twitter is where the nerds from highshool shine because we know how to use correct grammar, metaphors, & sarcasm correctly. And we can read.
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@TheAuthorGuy: Much as I like Guardians of the Galaxy, in real life, I don't think it's a good idea to give a gun to a raccoon.
@naazihah: Let's all just take a moment to appreciate the dedicated men and women of this great nation who sacrifice their evenings to deliver pizzas.
@skickwriter: Six words that strike fear in the hearts of parents everywhere: You've been volunteered as a chaperone
@caperbc75: Hulk Hogan walks into a tanning salon and drops a saddle on the counter. "Make me look like this brother!"