@prttylttleditty: Twitter is where the nerds from highshool shine because we know how to use correct grammar, metaphors, & sarcasm correctly. And we can read.
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@SaraMansford: Screw you, Burger King, if you really wanted me to have it "MY way" you'd have added alcohol to your menu.
@daemonic3: "I'm a skeleton!" *kisses and hugs you* Stop that! *kisses and hugs you again* What kind of skeleton are you?!? "An XO skeleton"
@BurroFuma: I saw an identical tweet of my joke! It was posted months before mine, so he's worse than a tweet thief; he's a time-travelling tweet thief!
@LizHackett: "Dammit. I had shit planned today." -- a spider being carried out of the house with a cup and piece of paper