@iGreenBabe: Twitter makes me want to have drinks with people I've never met, and Facebook makes me want to throw drinks at people I already know.
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@dlsims01: My co worker is so mad at me right now her eyes are bulging out like a pug. I don't know wether to call 911 or scratch her behind the ears.
@AristotlesNZ: Walked right by an ex-girlfriend today. Not on purpose, I just didn't recognize her with her mouth closed.
@Ristolable: I had a teacher in high school who always assumed we'd give the wrong answer. "What's hotter, green or red peppers?" Green "Nope. Green."