@stockejock: Twitter reminds me of what my grandpa always used to say, 'Who are you people and what are you all jabbering about anyway?'
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@MinchinRob: GF: I'm sick of communicating via walkie talkies. I think we should breakup ME: we should breakup what? OVER GF: its over ME: its what? OVER
@BlazedDonuts: The Walking Dead reminds you that other people would still be your biggest problem even if most of them died.
@Bipartisanism: "Joe Biden and I are so close, some places in Indiana refuse to serve us pizza." - President Obama
@FroggyGonnaJump: She might be Satan, but if I'm going to hell, I want to be sleeping with the boss.