@shutupmikeginn: Twitter should offer Shkreli his account back for $10,000 and if he agrees say sorry and suddenly raise the price 5600%
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@MartaEffing: *leaning seductively, slowly dragging fingertip across countertop* Me: how much for the entire case? Donut shop clerk: ma'am, $8.99 a dozen
@EndhooS: *Wife blows me a kiss from across the room* *I pretend to catch it* *I walk over to the window and toss it outside* "Grow up Karen"