@JustaFunEscape: Twitter to me is like the Bermuda triangle. I don't know how I got here and I'm not even sure where "here" is.
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@AthenaMystique: *sings Batman theme *crawls along bars of death *rolls down slope *ascends tower *knocks out foes "Miss, you need to leave the playground."
@GoddessTitty: Going to get a facial today... this guy on Craigslist is offering a way lower price than the salon!
@Phoebetate: To the squirrel carrying the mushroom up a tree to his nest: you may want to eat that with your feet firmly on the ground, buddy.
@Coastiefish: My car is equipped with the best anti-theft device in Florida. I call it "No air conditioning".