@ariscott: Twitter's original name was "Sentence Contest"
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@Steelers1972: The only difference between Black Friday and a zombie apocalypse is that zombies don't care if you get the last iPad Mini.
@over_rated: "HEY ATHLETES WITHOUT MONEY FOR TRAINING FACILITIES OR PROPER UNIFORMS, Y U NO WIN GOLD MEDALS?" - Indians
@hardlyrelevant: *holds up bread* this is my body *holds up wine* this is my blood *holds up fire* and this is my mixtape