@causticbob: Two blondes walk into a building... you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.
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@ThisOneSayz: Woman to friend at store: We can get shrimp for people who don't eat meat! Me: don't forget the cheese for the lactose intolerant people!
@DevilryFun: My doctor said to have a reasonable meal for dinner, so I talked some sense into my pizza.