@mofrorock: "Two's company, three's a crowd" - people who've never seen a crowd
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Paxochka: Now that Steve Jobs is gone we'll never ever know why c**t autocorrects to Cynthia. WHO WAS CYNTHIA?!?
@TheRolo: And on the 8th day, God almost created Lionel Richie but was all like "Naw, I'll just hold off a few thousand years then one day HELLO!"
@david8hughes: [interrogation] "Where were you on the night of the 5th?" "Dealing drugs." "Louder for the tape?" [leans in] "Healing pugs. I'm a pug vet."
@daemonic3: [interview] What's your greatest weakness? ME: Probably avoiding tough questions Can you elaborate on that? ME: Oh hey look at the time!