@pleatedjeans: U can give out anything on Halloween it doesn't have to be candy last year I gave a kid my cable bill it was awesome he paid it & everything
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@TheToddWilliams: [sideline] QB: Do you think I should go for it? COACH: I say go for it [huddle] CENTER: So? QB: Would you like to go for a coffee sometime?
@therealeatwood: “Errors in pronunciation eventually become part of the language if used widely enough over a long period of time” — linguists, supposably
@TheDoorTHEDOOR: An app that detects itself running on other people's phones, then both devices play Random Encounter music. What happens next is up to you.
@LostCatDog: Old professor stands in front of class: Look to your left. Now look to your right. Now look directly behind you. Welcome to Owl School