@VodkaThursday: U just HAD to be polite & hold the elevator for me. I could have had a nice, quiet ride alone. Instead, I had to be polite & talk about fall
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@deardilettante: I'm meeting a man I really like for drinks. If I play my cards right, he'll be deleting my number in a few hours.
@drhappyknuckles: First they came for the fat, whiny losers, and I said nothing, because they got me immediately. I was like the first person they got.
@michaeldean0116: 'I like the smell of your meat' may not have been the best greeting to the hot waiter at the BBQ joint I picked for lunch.