@mstern68: Uber is driving me to drink. Literally.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Gooooats: Me: you're going to bed in 5 minutes. Toddler: No. Twenty minutes! Me: Ok. *puts him to bed in 2 minutes because he has no concept of time*
@GinGander: Only 1 in 6 Americans can find Ukraine on a map... Putin is fixing the issue by just calling it all "Russia".
@Carmel_Coleman: Your car won't start? Have you tried getting out of it and then getting back into it again? That usually works for my computer.