@rysox80: Uh oh, happy facebook newlywed, your husband just created a twitter account.
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@KKAlThani: Kids are fun to be around. Then they start kicking, screaming, drooling, crying, fighting and then you're just grateful they're not yours.
@keatingthomas: They should give Martin Shkreli a six-month prison sentence, and then at the last second, say, "Actually, that just went up 500%."
@girlposts: having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house