@WilliamAder: Unable to stop their phones and washing machines from exploding, Samsung announced today they're changing their name to the ACME Corp.
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@wolfpupy: at the grampys, about to anounce who won the grampy award. open envelope. its grandpa!!! you did it congratulations
@Parkerlawyer: 5,"So we don't get to open any presents today?" Me, "No." 5, "So basically Thanksgiving is just Christmas for your tummy, right?"
@ValeeGrrl: Me: [sneaks off to lay by pool cuz kids are finally playing] 7yo: HERE I AM MOMMY SO YOU DON'T HAFTA BE ALONE Me: [sigh] Thanks bud.