@MelKassel: The woman next to me smells SO good, is it weird if I'm like "What perfume is that, I will literally stop robbing this bank if you tell me"?
@david8hughes: Her ankles were strong & sturdy, keeping her feet attached to her legs at all times. She had the eyebrows of a livid mechanic.
@murrman5: [waiting with friend for his test results]
"I'm nervous"
I'm sure you're fine *sees 2 doctors playing rock paper scissors outside room*
@itsdivbaby: when i hear fat people say that they've made mistakes, i always think to myself, "yeaa...at the grocery store."
@Parkerlawyer: I don't remember 6th grade science being this hard.
But then again, in 6th grade, I wasn't trying to do homework after 3 glasses of wine.
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