@better_off_dad: United Airlines just tried to charge me $25 for the bags under my eyes.
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@ReaIRonSwanson: 24 astronauts were born in Ohio. What is it about that state that makes people want to flee the planet?
@wolfpupy: dont put all your eggs in one basket, put them in the little egg tray in the fridge thats what its for you idiot
@charliedelta7: Just flipped my son off behind his back because I'm an adult and don't get into arguments with 4 year olds.