@BritXNic: Unless you met your spouse while committing a diamond heist, I don't need to hear how you got together.
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@sofarrsogud: ON PHONE WITH MY MOM HER: You still single and living with your stray cat family? ME: *proudly* No I am not! *high fives my pet penguin
@TheAlexNevil: *intercom SHEEPLE, WAKE UP! THE SAME CANDY THEY CALL “HALLOWEEEEEEN” CANDY IS AVAILABLE ALL YEAR LO...get off me...let go...NEVER FORGET!
@Cheeseboy22: I always make it a point to become friends with babies. That's free cake once a year for a lifetime.