@KateWhineHall: Until I had kids I didn't realize that "bouncing off the walls" was actually a literal statement.
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@drugleaf: the only proof i have that there is a god is that one time i saw a dude in a "Bazinga" shirt get into a car and drive directly into a tree
@dsmitty62: I see Paris, I see France, I got a great new pair of binoculars from an overpriced sporting goods store today
@rolldiggity: "I don't know where this rumor started, but Company and I are just good friends." -Misery
@my_boy_joey: I just saw a raccoon get hit by a Smart Car. The poor lil fella suffered a sprained ankle.