@SadPeruna: Until you show me in the corporate dress code where it says masks & capes aren't allowed, I must refuse to reveal my identity to the others.
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@Billhenry16: I found a new way to get my wife to wash the car. When ever it gets dusty I write the following on it: "I wish my Wife was this Dirty".
@hashtag_stacks: 'Sorry I liked your Facebook status, I was using my laptop as a plate'- my autobiography
@GingerHotDish: Sorry I licked my fingers before shaking your hand when we met, but I had Cheetos dust on them and I didn't want to seem gross.