@OverlyManlyMF: Uppercuts a horse. Creates the first girrafe.
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@thejamietighe: *rides in on giant turtle* Me:Sorry I'm late. Boss:You rode that to work? Me:No, went to the zoo. *phone rings* Me:That'll be the zoo.
@Book_Krazy: So excited! I'm taking an online grammar class. No more typos for me. Nolege is power biches!
@Thereeveryday: One day, the fridge will take revenge on me, every half hour opening the door to my room, staring at me for a few minutes & then walk away.
@JohnLyonTweets: [dog trial] D.A.: Who's a good boy? Dog: *wags tail* D.A.: Then how do you explain the scattered trash? Dog: *ears droop* *jury gasps*