@badbanana: URGENT! IF MY BOSS ASKS YOU IF IT'S REALLY "NATIONAL THROW YOUR COFFEE AT YOUR BOSS DAY" PLEASE SAY YES.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@elvisknievil: If you ever need 15 minutes of peace and quiet from texting, tell her to send a selfie.
@RdrJay47: Me: Wow, you're glowing. Her: Aaaaww, thank you! Me: No, like radioactive... Her: . . . Me: Tone down the filters?
@seamussaid: my daughter has been thrusting her stuffed animals in my face for me to kiss, but I'm being very selective so she learns to have standards
@audipenny: Sorry I was asleep when you texted me and just woke up when we ran into each other just now