@TitaniumToplass: use words like 'perpendicular' when you language at people so they think you is good with vocabularying
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@stephenjmolloy: Friend: Don't come on too strong is my dating tip. [At the restaurant] Her: Can you pass the salt, please? Me: Sorry, it's too heavy.
@1CleverClogs: My diet plan is just watching my 400 pound coworker lick her lips and sweat as she describes her dinner from last night.