@AimeeHelene1: You break into a petting zoo once, to try and brush a goat's teeth...and all of a sudden you're banned for life.
@AimeeHelene1: Jumping through hoops makes it sound too easy.
It should be something...more like...trudging through quicksand on 2 hours of sleep with a sinus infection.
@AimeeHelene1: I'm just a girl, yodeling at the top of my lungs, until someone agrees to give me this latte for free.
@AimeeHelene1: Me: *screaming*
HELP!! AHHHH! HELP! I CAN'T SEE!!
Him: Are you stuck in your sweater again?
Me: *muffled voice*
@AimeeHelene1: Me: What do you think about that?
5 minutes later
@AimeeHelene1: Me: *paddles kayak in circles until someone comes out to help me*
Them: You need some help out here?
Me: Can you bring me a beer?
@AimeeHelene1: The bathroom just ran out of paper towels, so obviously I had to wipe my hands on the next person I passed in the hallway.
@AimeeHelene1: I hate when I go to Subway and they barely put any toppings on.
When I take a bite, I want it to look like I went head to head with a garden, and won.
@AimeeHelene1: *spider falls on my desk*
*pulls fire alarm*
*stands in hallway & points firefighters toward my desk*