@AmishPornStar1: Go ahead, make fun of my cargo shorts
But we'll see who's laughing when you need a corkscrew, life raft, pillow or an extra tuna sandwich.
@AmishPornStar1: My wife's yoga class is really relaxing...
'Cuz she's usually gone for at least two hours.
@AmishPornStar1: I don't know why I always end up behind the old lady who is trying to do a reverse mortgage on her home at the ATM.
@AmishPornStar1: Don't you wish it was as easy to adjust the brightness level on people as it is on your phone?
@AmishPornStar1: *maintains eye contact while slowly putting in ear buds as you're talking to me*
@AmishPornStar1: "Be nice to everyone...
You never know who might have a pool."
@AmishPornStar1: Earth Day...
...another made up holiday by Big Galaxy just to sell more planets!
@AmishPornStar1: Of course morning sex is better.
You haven't spent the day annoying the crap out of each other yet.