@Book_Krazy: A fun way to make someone self conscious, is to put a nose hair trimmer in their grocery cart while maintaing full eye contact with them.
@Book_Krazy: Me: *showing the priest a gif of a dog chasing his tail* Haha it's like he never stops
Priest: Ok but I said "Bring the GIFTS to the alter"
@Book_Krazy: Call me crazy but "dropping the ball" does not sound like a good way to start off a new year.
@Book_Krazy: My husband just told me to relax, like he doesn't remember we're camping in the desert and I brought a shovel.
@Book_Krazy: Turtle 911: Whats ur emergency?
Turtle: MY GIRLFRIEND JUST DISAPPEARED!
911: Have u tried looking in her house?
Turtle: oops never mind.
@Book_Krazy: 9: Whatcha watching?
Me: Tiny Houses.
9: Wow it's tiny! Who's gonna live there?
Me: Two people.
9: Are they married?
Me: Not for long.
@Book_Krazy: Sam: Welcome to Multiple Personality Club.
Sam: No one else is here.
Sam: You're here.
Sam: I'M YOU, STUPID!
Sam: OK EVERYONE CALM DOWN!
@Book_Krazy: Me: It's late. I guess I'll go to bed.
-My brain, who up until now has always been the logical one "Let's put up a tent in the living room"
@Book_Krazy: [At Mall]
Good cop: CLEAR A PATH PEOPLE!
Bad cop: OFFICIAL POLICE BUSINESS
Black Friday cop: *Segways past everyone & gets the last HDTV*