Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of CYComedy's best tweets

@CYComedy : My goal weight is for it not to look like I'm having a stroke when I yawn.

@CYComedy: An upscale Asian restaurant called "Suit and Thai."

@CYComedy: Just had too much fun with a woman who lost her son named "Marco" in the supermarket just now.

@CYComedy: My goal weight is for my waiter to ask me if I want a salad with my meal without bursting into laughter.

@CYComedy: This Job Fair sucks, it doesn't even have rides.

@CYComedy: Any wife can be a trophy wife if you bring her to a Taxidermist.

@CYComedy: Is anybody else having trouble logging into my wife's Facebook account?

@CYComedy: Batman's Bat Signal was really banking on the fact that crimes only happened at night.

@CYComedy: As soon as I walk in, I can feel every woman at the gym dressing me with their eyes.