Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of CarolinaSong's best tweets

@CarolinaSong : I'll take an ice cream sandwich please. You know what? I'm trying to be healthy, can you change that to an ice cream salad instead? Thanks

@CarolinaSong: BUT YOU SAID IF I WANTED TO BE YOUR LOVER, I HAD TO GET WITH YOUR FRIENDS!

@CarolinaSong: I'm at the bar & I'm trying to convince this girl with a leopard print shirt to go & bite this girl with a zebra print shirt.

@CarolinaSong: That awkward moment when you text a pretty girl, "my shirt smells like you" & you misspell shirt

@CarolinaSong: Girls are like math problems. If they are under 18, its best you do them in your head

@CarolinaSong: Not tryin to impress anyone BUT the priest did just say I had the "body of Christ" right before he fed me a cracker. Gym has been paying off