Funny Tweeter

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Page of Cheeseboy22's best tweets

@Cheeseboy22 : A terrible baby shower game idea is called, "Have a man come in and guess which woman at the shower is pregnant."

@Cheeseboy22: I know you're not supposed to hug the old lady giving out samples at Costco, but the sausage she gave me had cheese inside. Cheese.In.Side.

@Cheeseboy22: The greatest joy you can feel as a parent is when you get the call that they've canceled your kid's Saturday sporting event.

@Cheeseboy22: My wife told me we need a new bathroom scale a week ago, but today she let me know that it wasn't something she wanted for Valentine's Day.

@Cheeseboy22: A child will either brush their teeth for 3 seconds or for 15 minutes.

@Cheeseboy22: I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream. This kid working at Baskin Robbins is pretty scared. Now he's crying in the corner.

@Cheeseboy22: I love my wife dearly, but she just used the word "whatevs" for the first time, so 17 years. It's been a good run.

@Cheeseboy22: Fun fact: At the end of Titanic, when all the people are dying in the water, you can hear a faint, "Marco" and then an even fainter, "Polo."

@Cheeseboy22: The lady behind me in line at Target was frustrated I was writing a check, so I got out a feather pen and ink bottle and did it right.

@Cheeseboy22: Overheard in 2nd grade class today:
"Do your work! Santa's watching right now."
"Yeah, my mom told me that ship has sailed for me long ago."