@Donna_McCoy: It's my patriotic duty to eat bbq and wave sparklers this weekend. Don't wreck it with words like "calorie count" and "hair on fire".
@Donna_McCoy: I make sure my husband thinks about me during the workday by packing him a sandwich that also falls apart for no reason.
@Donna_McCoy: Forgot to take off my makeup and woke up looking like Cyndi Lauper from 1983.
@Donna_McCoy: Cosmetic surgery is a great way to spend your life savings and end up looking like a surprised owl.
@Donna_McCoy: "Just gonna take a little off the top" I whisper, scooping all the icing from your cake with my fork.