Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of I_Bl33d_Purple's best tweets

@I_Bl33d_Purple : No Grandma, a friend with benefits is not someone who lends you a cup of sugar.

@I_Bl33d_Purple: If my memory serves me, the last time I was someone's type, I was donating blood.

@I_Bl33d_Purple: I'm trying to be more fit these days, so now I walk inside the store to buy my donuts instead of using the drive-thru.

@I_Bl33d_Purple: When I die, someone, please attend my funeral dressed as the Grim Reaper and just stand there and don't say a word. Thanks.

@I_Bl33d_Purple: *Opens Twitter*.....scrolls 4356 tweets....*checks for abs*