Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of MrGeorgeWallace's best tweets

@MrGeorgeWallace : Shout out to the top 5 suits in the world, 3-piece, zoot, swim, law and birthday.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Why did they call it 'Rambo: First Blood Part 2' instead of 'Rambo: Second Blood'? That's some bullshit right there.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Shout out to all the dormant volcanoes out there, just chillin', keepin' that magma to themselves and whatnot.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Shout out to the top 5 cakes in the world, crab, pan, pound, urinal and let them eat.

@MrGeorgeWallace: I'm just sayin', corn dogs are gonna have to pick a side when the shit goes down between corn and dogs.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Shout out to the top 5 phones, mega, micro, smart, speaker and get off the damn.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Why do football players only dance when good shit happens? Just once I wanna see a QB throw an interception & do a sad, interpretive dance.

@MrGeorgeWallace: I run a gambling ring where we throw humidifiers and dehumidifiers into a pit and let 'em fight that shit out.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Just hired a dirtying lady. About to watch her and my cleaning lady fight it out.

@MrGeorgeWallace: Shout out to all the animals that help Disney princesses get shit done.