Due to staff shortages, a lot of wizards have developed bad backs
I think those 5G masts are emitting invisible waves that make people more susceptible to conspiracy theories.
Just found a pot of houmous by the side of the road
What’s that? You want to hear my impression of an owl that repeats itself?
Well I couldn’t give two hoots.
The best time of day for a prostate examination is 6:30 because both hands are at the bottom.
Follow me on instagram here!
It won’t all be gold – most of it is barely pewter
Sometimes? I’m slipping
I told my American cousin this is what police cars in Scotland sound like
Expect the unexporcupine.
Roses are red
Violets are blue…
🍛
It’s been a good 12 months for dogs
Super Hand Dog Face
Man on train saying he’s in back-to-back meetings all day, I suggested trying face-to-face meetings. He left without thanking me.
I always watch Goldeneye before cooking a microwave meal…