Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of OneToothTexan's best tweets

@OneToothTexan : Sorry I borrowed your duck lips to pull a dent out of my car.

@OneToothTexan: Them: I’ve never been so insulted.

Me: I can do better.

@OneToothTexan: "My body wasn't designed for this."

- me, getting out of bed

@OneToothTexan: Them: I don’t like your attitude.

Me: have you tried not talking to me?

@OneToothTexan: People that drink Starbucks every morning, how do you decide which kid isn’t going to college?