@OneTrickTofani: WATSON: do you even have a proper education?
SHERLOCK: Elementary, my dear Watson
WATSON: but, like, beyond that
@OneTrickTofani: Just so u know guys I literally covered my roommates bed in 324 pieces of cornbread 2 make it a "cornbed" so ur fakes puns mean nothing 2 me
@OneTrickTofani: [At Wedding]
Priest: And do you take me as your lawfully wedded wife?
Me: I do. WAIT A SECOND
Priest: TOO LATE. YOU'RE MINE NOW, IDIOT.
@OneTrickTofani: *proposes to girlfriend, accidentally dropping the ring in the ocean*
"I'll still marry you"
No. I'm married to the sea now
@OneTrickTofani: *Robber runs into Chipotle*
GIMME THE MONEY IN THE REGISTER
"Is this for here or to go?"
Uh. To go
"Do you want guac?"
@OneTrickTofani: "GENTLEMEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH TROY AND MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD AT ALL"
"Sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse"
"Oh rad bring it in"