Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of PAT_E_ROCK's best tweets

@PAT_E_ROCK : I just smoked the fattest blunt.. And now my refrigerator is nervous!

@PAT_E_ROCK: The water drought in California is so bad, that someone broke into my cousins house and stole his waterbed.

@PAT_E_ROCK: Girl: So, how many inches is it?
Pat: How many inches is what?
G: You know..
P: Uhhh, about 200 dollars long.
G: OMG, It's so big!

@PAT_E_ROCK: Dr: You have walking pneumonia.
Me: That's impossible.
Dr: Wha..
Me: I've never walked a day in my life.

@PAT_E_ROCK: BREAKING NEWS: Due to the horrible conditions at Sochi, the Olympics have been moved to a much safer place.. Chernobyl.

@PAT_E_ROCK: Joined Match.com... And all I got was a lit cigarette

@PAT_E_ROCK: My favorite superheros are.. Baskin and Robbin!