Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of Sanbel11's best tweets

@Sanbel11 : I just bought a beautiful 18th century bowl. It even has a little sign on the bottom that says dishwasher safe.

@Sanbel11: *goes shopping without makeup and a hair in the messy bun*

"Hi everybody I ever met since 1999"

@Sanbel11: Him: Baby are you mad?

Me:
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No, why?

@Sanbel11: "Baby, I'm in the bedroom waiting for you"

Now I got your attention, let me show you a proper way to make the bed.

@Sanbel11: It's so cold out, that I don't know who's just wrapping up warm and who's a ninja.

@Sanbel11: "Please let go of my hair"

-my gynaecologist

@Sanbel11: -Come on, it's time to go

-No

-We are going to be late

-I hate school

-But Mum, you have to take me!

@Sanbel11: He was a real gentlemen and always opened the fridge door for me

@Sanbel11: Me: NO!

Him: What? I haven't even said anything

Me: Oh, you looked like you were about to

@Sanbel11: My superpower is turning "never again" to "ok, one more time"