@SortaBad: Body: go to sleep
Brain: what country has the largest population of goats? Better run a search on this
@SortaBad: Why I don't get dates:
Her: It's been light-years since I've had this much fun
Me: Actually, a light-year is a unit of distance, not time
@SortaBad: A good prank is to rent a Mercedes, stick a huge bow on it, and park it in front of your neighbor's house
@SortaBad: You say tomato. I say tomato. Our eyes meet. We've decided on the perfect name for our baby
@SortaBad: John: Hey Jude...
Paul: Don't make it bad
George: Take a sad song...
Ringo: So weird how coffee is yummy hot or cold but gross in-between
@SortaBad: We can land a rover on freakin Mars but still no single-button to push for the
@SortaBad: No one in my entire life has believed in me more than the waiter who just gave me a single napkin to use while eating my lunch
@SortaBad: Fellow Black Friday shopper: I'm so excited! What are you trying to buy?
Me: oh I can't afford anything, I'm hoping to be trampled to death
@SortaBad: "I'm dreaming about mashed potatoes"
Oh because Thanksgiving is tomorrow
"No, just a normal mashed potato dream like usual"